it wasn't lemon gatorade
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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