Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
