thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Randomize
