member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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