Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize
