I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
