It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Randomize
