I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Randomize
