Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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