it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
