dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
she looked like the before picture.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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