I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
drinking out of a sandbucket again
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
