as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
