there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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