Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
