you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize