i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
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