Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
