i just google imaged poop.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
