Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Bring me that man meat
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
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