How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
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