What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Randomize
