We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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