There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
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