Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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