Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Randomize
