why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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