matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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