did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
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