The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Randomize