Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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