theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
