No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Randomize
