wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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