did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize
