I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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