this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Randomize
