I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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