so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
