I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
