is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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