So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
