what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
