what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize
