Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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