my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
