Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
Randomize
