Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
