We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
