You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
