i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
You broke her grandpas urn and ran your hand through his ashes claiming it was pixie dust. I think thats why shes mad at you..
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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